Monday, May 24, 2010

I’ve just bout givin up on bears….

If one doesn’t come down soon, whose just decided to commit suicide anyway, then wakes me and the girls by ‘tapping his claws on the window’; I think its safe to say - I wont be punching by bear-tag this season?

Especially considering I pretty much said %#&%* it a long time ago...


When the season was starting out I was excited and had even told numerous interviewers if they cant reach me:”Its probably because I’m bear hunting..?” I even left this on my answering-machine for a while, till it became apparent I’d likely never kill a bear, much less get a job using that line of thought.

“Ya cant eat em, can you..?” A guy asked, and I had to stand there and wonder if you could or couldn’t?

Maybe he’s right:”Why would anyone wanna kill a silly bear if ya cant even eat em..”
“…Besides, I don’t even have the $300.00 deposit it’d take to get a rug made..?”

- I always like to rationalise things this way, when it appears I’ll not get what I want. Same goes for working at fly shops or ever getting married…
”I don’t want no bitch tellin me what ta do anyway!?” I’ve said damned near evertime someone asked.

It works, though only till the next day when your applying for work at a stupid carwash or wishing someone would make you dinner for once, or wondering what it would be like to shoot a damned bear?


Yes, this is one that will keep nagging at me until I do it I guess. I did drive up to a couple places a friend told me about that “has huge bears” last week, but when I got there I realised this area was in fact one, like the gal at the Ranger Station had told me about; where ‘all the gates are locked’ and you have to walk near 2 miles across private porperty just to get into the public-zones, and then on from there if you wanna see a bear?

Once that was quickly nixed without even contemplating such a nuisance, I ventured toward the second ‘road-hunting possibility’ on my list, and couldn’t find where the damned thing started!?


Before I knew it I was in Livingston and driving south along the Yellowstone and looking for the back-way in? I finally spotted it as the road seemed to go back toward Bozeman along Divide Hwy. A two-lane dirt road that stretches between the mountains and is considered ‘a short-cut’ by some when coming to the Yellowstone, but I’m thinking only for the scenery; as it was washboard in some areas and not any shorter than taking the highway I don’t think.

Still, it was beautiful and it had hillsides that probably held bears, but now that green-up is here; the bastards could be anywhere I suppose? At least none showed themselves on that trip either. I did spy some elk and lots of mule deer too, along with some way out lodges and cabins that were posted obnoxiously of course. So I drove onto the few entrances into NWR’s along the 50 mile stretch and once there realised of course, like most other places unless I hiked my butt up some steep shit, I wasn’t likely to find one raiding an empty trashcan, as I’d begun hoping for.

“A bear..? who gives a shit bout a bear anyway?” I told myself on the ride home, as I had every ride home for the past 2 weeks.


But of course, this line of thought only works until I log-in to another bloody hunting forum and see where soem jackass went out and shot one in his backyard and I wanna go all over again. So I’ve still got a few spots to checkout before this season wraps up and just maybe...I'll 'at least see one of the critters' if nothing else.


In the meantime I’ve ridden my bicycle almost everynight since I bought it, and have all totaled likely ridden at least a dozen miles? I’m pacing myself on anything longer than a 2 mile ride per day, as I really am putting a lot of pressure on that back rim, and the bikes putting equal pressure in areas of male anatomy that are never good.

I’ve gone on a diet that consists mostly of salad, tuna, and vegetables; with the occasional huge portion of BBQ or pizza when I’m so hungry I have to get out of bed in the middle of night and make a sandwich.

The diet, like the bike riding, are areas I kinda knew would be difficult to maintain, but I aim to do it for the sake of living another day. Also if I can shed a few pounds I might be more inclined to take up another trail here into a mountain range; though at this rate its looking more like I’ll be fit about a month after bear-season ends,...but should be good-to-go for elk and bird come next October…?